Okay... I did say you guys can go back to your own planets, but that doesn't mean you can abandon me alone here ='(..
Alright so.. some of you might know what happened if you read my blog. He came back yeah? And.. you know how determined I was to be indifferent right? And... I think it's disintegrating now... So your job, is to help me again. Hehehe...
I've talked to Nicky, my closest friend here, about it, and it is working, but not enough.
I keep wanting to convince myself that he's a jerk and there's no point in wasting time and effort on him. But somehow deep inside, it's hard to do, because a part of him actually cares and isn't a jerk. He's the kind of guy who would shower you with sweet stuff and keep doing those sweet things. He's far from that. But sometimes what he does is indirectly sweet and nice.
2 nights ago, my cousin, her friend, and a guy called roshan, him and i went to this italian resto/cafe up near the mountains. It was nice and before that, he lied to me and said that another friend told him to go somewhere and so he couldn't come. I asked roshan, who would be our driver for the night if that's true, and he said it's not cuz tris was going to his house already. So... I half believed both of them and still went anyway. Then when he picked me up, tris was in it and was smiling to himself. Anyway, the whole thing was nice and for some reason he kept talking about things and then kept looking at me and say "i told you this right?". I mean... he kept doing that all the time!! It might be stupid but I felt like... I was important or smth? Hahaha... maybe i'm over-reacting. Then after that, I asked him if the whole story of going out with other friends was just a joke. He said no, he cancelled on them. I said why. And he said smth like "I felt committed to you[me] first" What's that supposed to mean? Like first priority or something? But why? And since he came back from Cambodia, he doesn't seem to be hanging out with the other girl he said he has feelings for. Maybe i'm wrong but it seems like it. Cuz to roshan, he said "she[me]'s the only girl i hang out with now" But why? I really wished he would go back to his old self and just go anywhere he wants. Or maybe it's just cuz the guy he usually goes out at night with is gone or smth. I dunno... And that night too, I know he kinda wanted to drink beer, but somehow, he didn't. He knows how I am with him and alcohol. And he keeps asking me, every single day without fail, what i would be doing that day and if we can meet. With him, I feel like every single day is... precious or smth. I can feel each day going by like that. I don't know,... it's like i start to see time in small fragments and each little one of them is precious. That's the best I can describe in words. But it's more than that. I can actually feel time go by. Feel it... which is weird.
Your job!! Is to convince me to stop. =D
The story's much longer actually, but it's so much easier to explain face to face.
LOVE YOU GUYS!!! <3<3<3
Names: [[Su Peng]] [[Xin Yi]] [[Wan Shi]] [[Winy]]
[[ Don't talk crap, it's fucking rude ]]
Okay... I did say you guys can go back to your own planets, but that doesn't mean you can abandon me alone here ='(..
Alright so.. some of you might know what happened if you read my blog. He came back yeah? And.. you know how determined I was to be indifferent right? And... I think it's disintegrating now... So your job, is to help me again. Hehehe...
I've talked to Nicky, my closest friend here, about it, and it is working, but not enough.
I keep wanting to convince myself that he's a jerk and there's no point in wasting time and effort on him. But somehow deep inside, it's hard to do, because a part of him actually cares and isn't a jerk. He's the kind of guy who would shower you with sweet stuff and keep doing those sweet things. He's far from that. But sometimes what he does is indirectly sweet and nice.
2 nights ago, my cousin, her friend, and a guy called roshan, him and i went to this italian resto/cafe up near the mountains. It was nice and before that, he lied to me and said that another friend told him to go somewhere and so he couldn't come. I asked roshan, who would be our driver for the night if that's true, and he said it's not cuz tris was going to his house already. So... I half believed both of them and still went anyway. Then when he picked me up, tris was in it and was smiling to himself. Anyway, the whole thing was nice and for some reason he kept talking about things and then kept looking at me and say "i told you this right?". I mean... he kept doing that all the time!! It might be stupid but I felt like... I was important or smth? Hahaha... maybe i'm over-reacting. Then after that, I asked him if the whole story of going out with other friends was just a joke. He said no, he cancelled on them. I said why. And he said smth like "I felt committed to you[me] first" What's that supposed to mean? Like first priority or something? But why? And since he came back from Cambodia, he doesn't seem to be hanging out with the other girl he said he has feelings for. Maybe i'm wrong but it seems like it. Cuz to roshan, he said "she[me]'s the only girl i hang out with now" But why? I really wished he would go back to his old self and just go anywhere he wants. Or maybe it's just cuz the guy he usually goes out at night with is gone or smth. I dunno... And that night too, I know he kinda wanted to drink beer, but somehow, he didn't. He knows how I am with him and alcohol. And he keeps asking me, every single day without fail, what i would be doing that day and if we can meet. With him, I feel like every single day is... precious or smth. I can feel each day going by like that. I don't know,... it's like i start to see time in small fragments and each little one of them is precious. That's the best I can describe in words. But it's more than that. I can actually feel time go by. Feel it... which is weird.
Your job!! Is to convince me to stop. =D
The story's much longer actually, but it's so much easier to explain face to face.
LOVE YOU GUYS!!! <3<3<3